


Whisked Away

by ramsay_baggins



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Marvel Cinematic Universe Phase One Compliant, Not Marvel Cinematic Universe Phase Two Compliant, Pain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-05
Updated: 2019-04-05
Packaged: 2020-01-05 07:48:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18361703
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ramsay_baggins/pseuds/ramsay_baggins
Summary: Tony is suddenly and accidentally teleported to an unknown location with nothing but his clothes, a pen knife and some safety goggles. The other Avengers try to get him back but hope dwindles as the weeks drag on.





	Whisked Away

**Author's Note:**

> I rediscovered a fic that was almost finished on my dropbox from 2014 - this has been sitting waiting for five years! I barely made any changes, just added a couple hundred words at the end. As such this fic is only phase one compliant - any reference to other MCU characters outside of phase one was just to add to the world.
> 
> This fic contains a section of fairly graphic pain, a lot of angst, the avengers thinking one of them is dead and mourning for him. It has a happy ending though!

“I mean really,” Tony murmured around the screwdriver in his mouth as he tinkered with the device he was inventing, “it just takes a bit of” he took the screwdriver out of his mouth and squinted into the machine, turning something, “lateral thinking.” He straightened up, looking satisfied, wiping the grease off of his fingers with a dirty cloth, smiling brightly at Steve.

Steve couldn’t help but smile back, Tony’s enthusiasm was very contagious. “So explain this thing to me again,” he said, knowing the answer he was going to get back.

Tony waved his arms, “It’s very interesting,” he said, picking it up, “It does things.”

Steve looked at him pointedly, waiting for Tony to look up and notice.

Tony glanced and caught the stare, “Hey, I know what it does! Or at least, I will. Yes. I will,” his eyes filled with the well-known look of mischief, “As soon as I test it.”

Steve’s look darkened, “I hope you mean to test it in some way it won’t hurt you.”

Tony’s eyebrows rose with a childlike fake innocence, “Yeeesssss?” He smiled in a ‘don’t be angry’ way.

“Tony-” Steve started before he got cut off by Tony’s outstretched arm, hand boldly in a stop position.

“I know what I’m doing, Steve,” he said, “I know you mean well, but just... just let me be me in my lab, k?”

Steve sighed and sat back into his chair, defeated. He knew Tony’s lab was his realm and he couldn’t take that away from him, “Ok. Just promise me you’ll _try_ and be safe. Just a little bit?”

Tony smiled at him, amused. “I’ll wear safety goggles, just for you.”

 

 

  
Steve was carrying their takeaway down the stairs, shovelling some noodles into his mouth with the chopsticks and almost losing the second container he had wedged between his arm and ribs. Swallowing his food he noticed Tony was still hunched over his unknown invention and smiled to himself.

“Can you open the door please JARVIS?” he asked, still preferring to get permission rather than barge in on Tony.

The door clicked open, “I feel it apt to inform you that that Sir is currently about to begin tests on the device,” came JARVIS’ reply through the speakers.

“Thanks.”

Steve confidently strode into the lab, putting down the food on one of the workbenches.

“Hi Tony, dinner’s here.” Tony grunted in response. Steve noticed in amusement that he was indeed wearing a pair of safety goggles and couldn’t stop himself from smiling.

“Come on,” he said softly, “You can spare a bite to eat before you test it. It’ll still be there when you’re finished eating.”

“Just one button, Steve? Just let me push the button once?” Tony turned and pouted at him. Steve was powerless to resist and dropped into a chair. He shovelled another mouthful of chow mein into his mouth and muffled, “Oh go on, just once.”

Tony’s grin made it worth it. “Ok,” he said, standing back a few steps, “See, I’m being careful!” He was holding a button on a wire in his hand. Steve stuck his tongue out at the tease. “Three, two, one.” Tony pushed the button.

And nothing happened.

“Huh,” Tony said, looking with confusion and disappointment, “It was supposed to do _someth_ -”

Steve was already on his feet, lurching towards Tony, a strangled scream of terror in his throat. But he was too late, Tony was gone.

“ _-ing_.” Tony was surrounded by a roaring sound painfully loud. Suddenly the noise stopped and he felt his ears pop. He blinked, stunned.

 

 

 

“Tony!” Steve was screaming, standing in the spot the portal had appeared. He turned wildly, trying to find something in the lab he could use to bring him back, to find out where he was. When it finally sunk in that Tony was gone, and Steve didn’t know where or how he felt himself go into Captain mode.

“JARVIS?”

“Yes Captain?”

“Do you have any idea what just happened or where he is?”

“No, Captain.”

Steve took a deep breath in, trying to control the bile he felt rising in his throat. This was bad.

“I need you to summon the rest of the Avengers. We’ll meet in my studio. Have the footage ready, along with the details of the thing that did this to Tony. I’ll meet them there in five minutes and they better all be there by the time I arrive.”

“I’ve had the alarm sounding since the moment he left my system, Captain.” There was a beat of pause, “Are you taking your food with you?” JARVIS sounded concerned.

Steve looked back at his half eaten Chinese, and Tony’s still full containers. He sighed.

“I’m not hungry.”

 

 

 

Tony snapped out of the shock and turned to take in his surroundings. The air was murky, hot and humid, the ground was soft and leaf strewn. Around him were some spindly leafy trees, but what really struck him was how bare of vegetation the area was, instead most of the space was taken up by the trunks and buttresses of huge trees. He slowly followed one of these trunks up to see the canopy far above him, some small beams of sunlight managing to get through the dense foliage and vines. The trees and canopy were alive with sound.

“Well,” he said to himself, rubbing the fog out of his safety goggles, “This is my first visit to a rainforest.”

He retreated into his thoughts, trying to remember any survival knowledge for this environment. He was taught from a young age how to protect himself should be find himself in certain situations, and since his experience in Afghanistan and building the armour he had worked hard to make himself feel invincible. One thing he had not trained for, however, was magically ending up in the middle of an unknown rainforest without his armour, without his phone and with no reference point for his friends to find him. He patted himself down, checking for injuries or anything else that might cause a problem. What he found instead was a bulge in one of his pants pockets. He reached in and pulled out a multi tool. He looked at the item in shocked confusion for a moment before letting a laugh escape his lips. He always had his penknife on him, just for the comfort of having tools at hand for any tinkering that might need done. It was such an ingrained habit that he’d completely forgotten that he had it. Maybe, just maybe, he had a chance.

“At least it was my fault this time and not some crazed kidnappers,” he mumbled aloud as he looked around again. He wished he could remember what was safe to eat. He felt his resolve strengthen, his first task was to find a stream or river. Follow the stream flow and he should eventually reach people or the sea. Both of those options were better than staying where he was and waiting for rescue because no one knew where he was in the first place.

 

 

The video stopped playing and the Avengers stared in silence. Steve had ushered them all into his studio and asked JARVIS to play the footage through the projector Tony had had installed. Pepper was stuck in very intense negotiations with important officials in Asia regarding Stark Industries factories and distribution and he hadn’t been able to get through to her. Steve hadn’t told them what had happened or why they were there, but they all knew it wasn’t good.

Eventually Clint broke the silence, “So, where is he?”

Steve swallowed, “I don’t know.” He took a deep breath and looked at their expectant faces, “And neither does JARVIS.”

Bruce rubbed at his chin, “So, we need to find out what that machine was, and we need to run the data to find out where it could have sent him.”

“Right,” Steve nodded. “JARVIS, could you put the schematics up on the screen please?”

Complex engineering diagrams and notes popped up on the screen, JARVIS ran a number through across the next few minutes, and showed them from a 360 degree angle.

Bruce spoke again, “Tony Stark, absolute genius, nightmare to understand. I have no idea what is going on with that thing. I don’t think I’ll be able to work it out, either.”

“Well then we need to get to work on a way to track him,” Natasha cut in, stealing the words from Steve’s mouth.

“Aye, if we have no way to decipher where this machine has sent the Man of Iron, then we must take it upon ourselves to hunt him down,” Thor added. The large man was obviously restless, he and Tony had become firm friends after the battle of Manhattan.

Clint piped up, “Can’t we track his phone? Even if he doesn’t have sig-“

“He doesn’t have it, he left it on his lab bench for the experiment,” Steve explained. “He’s just got his pants, his shirt and his... his safety goggles.” He smiled wanly, remembering Tony’s jest.

The room went silent again, trying to figure out how they were going to find their friend. Steve felt the frustration building again until he couldn’t hold it it.

“For God’s sake, couldn’t he have tried to be careful just once? At least if he’d been kidnapped we’d have a ransom note or something to go off of! This is all his own fault and we don’t have anywhere to start!” he kicked a chair across the room, and then felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked at Thor who had moved to stand beside him.

He sighed and all the rage left him, “I’m sorry, I just... I just can’t lose another friend.”

Thor looked at him with soft eyes, “I understand friend Steve, but know this, we will find Tony. No one in this room will rest until we have retrieved him.”

“I’ve got an idea,” Bruce announced, the rest of the team turning to stare at him.

“It’s just an idea, but there’s a possibility we can track him through his arc reactor.”

“How?” Steve asked quickly.

“He created a new element to power it. As far as I know the only atoms of that element all exist within that arc reactor, and they should give out a unique signature. That combined with hopefully the amplification of the signal through the nature of the arc reactor and the metal casing should allow us to triangulate him to at least a vague area.”

“How vague?” Natasha responded.

“Well, he should hopefully know what continent he’s on,” Bruce said, looking at the ground.

All of the Avengers knew that Bruce had deliberately avoided the implication that Tony may not have landed on a continent at all. Or possibly not even the planet.

Natasha looked around at the team, “I’ll tell Pepper.”

 

 

Tony huddled in with his back against the tree, nestled in as tightly as possible between the buttresses of the giant emergent. He absentmindedly scratched at skin around the arc reactor and started when he saw his damp fingers come away stained. He looked down at his chest and saw the red-brown blooms of rust which had started to take hold on the metal casing of the reactor. He cursed, he thought the reactor was pretty rust resistant, but with any alloy that contained iron rust was a risk. The coating must have got scratched in the days he had been walking through the forest, and in such a damp environment it was a perfect opportunity for rust to get in and grow. He had been so focused on finding some kind of waterway and keeping himself hydrated and somewhat fed, if some berries or fruit few and far between counted, that he hadn’t noticed it taking hold. He ran through a diagnostic in his mind as he checked the reactor.  
_Outer casing, scratched with rust blooms. Reactor itself doesn’t seem to be affected, cannot identify any changes in tone, temperature or feel any different vibrations._ He carefully ran his fingers across the entire surface of the reactor. _Windows intact, structural integrity not compromised yet, could possibly become an issue if the rust continues to spread._ He moved his hands to the sides of the casing. _Internal casing tube seemingly intact without any rust._ He breathed a sigh of relief, the internal structure rusting would have been a much more serious problem. It seemed that, as it was mostly internal and the tiny exposed section being protected by the removable section of casing, it had been saved any compromising scratches.

He drew his knees in against his chest to block his view of the reactor, his mind instead changing to his team. He wondered how they were doing, what they were getting up to. If they were even looking for him. If there was any chance of them ever finding him. He had disappeared using an unknown device, he had no phone, no suit, there was nothing to tell them where he could be. For all they knew he could have ended up at the bottom of the Marianas Trench or the summit of Olympus Mons. His last vision of Steve broke through. He’d seen his face change, a look of panic coming across it, a lurch as he began to leave his seat, he’d heard the start of a scream and then he’d disappeared. The portal or whatever it was must have opened up behind him, Steve seeing it before Tony could react.  It felt like a fist was squeezing his stomach as he thought about how Steve would have been left in the lab alone, with no idea what had happened, trying to find some way to bring him back.

 

 

 

“I'm re-running an analysis of the traces left in the lab,” Natasha said, concentrating on the complex system on the screen.

“Trying to capture any information from the lab cameras,” Steve called in, watching the recording intently to see if you could make anything out that they hadn't already gleaned from hours of extensive running and re-running of data.

Thor was helping Clint go through the bits and pieces of inventions and plans left in Tony’s lab, hoping something useful would suddenly jump out at them _._ Thor had spent much of the time since the incident cursing the fact he wasn’t able to contact Heimdall. Odin had spent so much energy getting Thor back down to earth after Loki’s capture that he couldn’t get home for months.

Bruce was working hard on a better triangulation of the arc reactor's signal. It was damn difficult, he couldn't get the area smaller than ‘South America’, and even that had taken him days. Of course Tony had to go missing while all of the other geniuses who could have helped were away on long projects. Reed, Strange... none of them were available. He took long, deep breaths, trying to fill his head with calculations and data, trying new set-ups, new work arounds. He glanced back at the screen, back at his work, before what he saw sank in and he slowly looked back up at the screen. The signal was fading. Slowly, but surely, over the last week it had been obvious it was disappearing. Bruce slapped the side of the monitor and muttered. He was holding onto hope that the systems were faulty. The faint signal finally winked out. It was gone. He was gone.

Bruce stared at the screen, just stared. Mind blank. His vision went white, he felt like the earth was spinning and the floor was melting under his feet. He felt a hand on his shoulder.

Steve stared at the screen, the rest of the Avengers huddled around trying to comprehend what the computer screen was saying. Steve squeezed without feeling.

The white turned to red, Bruce feeling himself vibrate, feeling the strings of his muscles tighten, his tendons going taught, the Other Guy scrabbling his way out, clawing his way through Bruce's consciousness. Bruce threw his head back and let out a primal roar.

“GET OUT” he roared at the other Avengers, who were already at the door. Steve saw the Hulk smash his fists through the computer and table as he closed the locked the door.

 

 

 

The rust had got worse, now the surface of the reactor flaked with sharp wafers of rusted metal punishing any absent minded tapping or checking. The skin around it had started to redden and itch, worse than normal. Tony wished he had something to put on it, to ease the heat and itch of the spreading rash. He bent over to adjust under the strap on his shoes. He’d quickly realised that in such a wet environment his feet would not last long in his sodden sneakers. Using his knife to rip through the material he’d separated the sole, worked some holes into the side and used string-like tough vines to create an open sandal. It allowed his feet to breathe yet also protected them from some of the nastier hidden things in the leaf litter. The safety goggles had been modified in a similar way, strapped around his chest to protect his red stained reactor. He used a makeshift spear as a walking pole, having found a long, sturdy stick and used the multi-tools knife to whittle the end into a point. It had taken him most of a long evening, but luckily he had managed to build a small fire that night so he had some light. He’d fire hardened the point, feeling a little safer and more optimistic with even such a crude longer range tool in his possession. His knife was a fantastic tool, but the spear he could hold out in front of him, keeping anything he needed to at longer than arm’s length.  
It had also proved extremely useful as a hunting tool, with many hours of practice finally wielding its first reward in the form of a decently sized fish speared out of the river he was following. He’d had to cut his pants at the knees so he didn’t have warm, wet fabric sticking to his legs all the time, but the temperature was hot enough that it didn’t matter. He’d stopped being aware of the myriad scratches and cuts he was collecting on his unprotected legs, and the cut material of his pants worked as a crude water filter, allowing the water to pass through while catching larger particles. He’d even started to become a little more proficient at making crude bark bowls, which didn’t burn in the fire so long as there was water in them. He tried to boil as much of his drinking water in them as possible.

 

 

“Captain Rogers,” JARVIS' voice came quietly through the room, “Dr Banner is in his lab.”

Steve looked up towards the ceiling. “Thank you, JARVIS.”

He walked softly down the corridor towards Bruce's reinforced lab, took a deep breath as much to keep control of himself as comfort Bruce, and opened the door. His heart broke into more pieces when he caught sight of the view inside, something he didn't think was possible after all that had already happened today. He looked at the curled up, naked form of Dr Banner in the middle of the room, nothing left intact and the lights flickering. The entire contents of the lab had been turned to rubble, Steve could see blood on Bruce's knees and hands where he had dropped exhausted onto the ground and cut himself on the sharp pieces of destroyed equipment. Steve saw the vulnerable body shudder and heard the pained sobs coming from his friend, he seemed reduced to a lost child who couldn't escape the nightmare he found himself in.

Steve paused, not knowing how to soothe his grief-wracked team mate. He took a long, slow breath in, held it with closed eyes, and let it out as he walked carefully across the floor and hunkered down beside Bruce. He saw him curl tighter, pulling his knees further into his chest burrowing his head further into himself. Making himself as small as possible to shield himself from the outside world, from having to face the facts. Another spasm of heart-breaking sobs wracked his body. Steve said nothing, instead unfolding the blanket he had brought with him and draping it over Bruce's shaking body. After a few moments Steve saw the blanket bunch as Bruce reached out a few fingers and drew it closer. Steve waited. After what felt like an eternity, but what could only have been a couple of minutes, the sobs became quieter and Bruce's body began to relax. Steve moved to sit, brushing away a few pieces of debris to find a relatively comfortable position. Bruce began to sit up, drawing the blanket around him tightly, his eyes red and swollen and his nose and lips irritated and cracked. Steve had hoped never to have had to see a man in this state again. He waited. That was what you had to do, you had to wait. You had to let them start, let them come to terms with it themselves. Let them scream, let them shout, let them whisper.

Eventually, not meeting Steve's eyes, Bruce spoke. “He was the only person, the only one. The only one who never flinched. Not once.” His voice cracked. “Even you, even Captain America, you were wary. You distrusted me.”  
Steve ached, but he didn't say anything because he knew it was true. He had never been a fan of the Hulk coming along on that first mission. When he didn't know Bruce, he'd just read a file.

“Tony never cared. Not once. He never saw the Other Guy. He just saw me, a guy with a kind of inconvenient case of demons. Hell, he poked me with a stick.” Bruce looked up at Steve and his eyes showed the pain, “That was what Tony did. He wasn't scared. He was interested, never scared. Never made me feel like a monster, never made me feel like I was walking on eggshells.”

His eyes glanced around the lab and another small sob left his throat, “He built me this, not because he wanted to contain me, not because he wanted to experiment on me, but because he wanted me around. Because he wanted me to feel comfortable staying in the tower without feeling like I was going to kill someone. Because I was his _friend_. I don't _have_ friends, Steve. Not before Tony and the team, and Tony was the one that allowed me to ever get close to people because he never treated me as anything other than a human being.”

“I know,” Steve said quietly, putting a hand on Bruce's knee gently.

Bruce gave him a look Steve had hoped never to have seen again, “How did you do it, Steve?” he whispered.

Steve paused, reliving the moment where he saw Bucky fall, helpless to save his best friend, the only person who had stuck with him through everything, who had never dismissed him before he changed. “Genuinely? I don't know. I just... had to. There wasn't an option. Day by day. Just day by day.” He looked at his feet and raised his head, quietly talking to himself as much as Bruce, “I never imagined I would have to live through something this painful again. And here we are.”

He looked at Bruce and something passed between them, understanding, sympathy, brotherhood. They both sat in silence, unstirring, silently mourning Tony Stark.

 

 

Tony stood calf high in the shallower waters by the river bank. He barely moved, the tendons and sinews in his legs tight and visible through his skin, his muscles bunched in concentration. His eyes darted and flicked across the water’s surface, blinking out the sweat which ran down his forehead. His fingers tensed on around the spear before, like lightening, he flashed forward and plunged the spear into the water. He leaned his weight onto the spear, waiting until it stopped struggling against his grip. Tony heaved a sigh and lifted his prize out of the water. The fish was big, one of the biggest he’d caught, and he trudged back to the bank through the mud with a tight grin on his face. He would go to sleep full tonight.  
He spitted the gutted fish through with a long thin branch and balanced it across the fire pit using a couple of big rocks he’d liberated from the river bank. As it started to cook and the water in his bark bowl started to steam he stood and walked away from the area he’d picked to stay tonight to relieve himself. It was later than he’d thought and he found the forest away from the glow of the fire to be on the edge of too dark to see. As he leant against the tree there was a tremendous creak followed by a crashing noise which filled the air with chaos and confusion. Tony jumped before turning to look at his campsite. His mind racing, he started to dash back to the glow of the fire. In his mind he knew it was just a deadfall and that if it was close enough to be a problem he would have felt the branches and leaves being torn down around him, but being out in the dark was not a very settling experience.  
As he took the last couple of strides into the area he’d cleared he felt something catch on his foot. He was going too fast to stop, instead he sprawled into the dirt, feeling his foot rip away from the obstacle. He cried out in pain as tears formed in his eye. Catching his breath he pushed himself up off the ground and hobbled over the fire. He was scared to look at what had happened, his foot was in agony, fire rippling through his nerves and almost overpowering his exhausted body. He sat down by the flames and used the light to examine his foot. He sighed both in relief and apprehension. The nail on his right big toe had been completely ripped off, blood flowing through the now raw nail back and bed. He knew injuries like that not only bled and reopened constantly, but that his toe was now a prime target for infection. An infection that, in this environment, could easily become deadly. He clenched his jaw with the knowledge of what he was going to have to do. He was going to need to cauterise the wound.

 

 

The alert rang through the tower, Avengers Assemble. The team scrambled for their kit, picking up shields, holstering guns, shoving in earpieces. As they ran into the Quinjet Cap started his customary team check.

“Widow.”

“Yep.”

“Hawkeye.”

“Right here.”

“Bruce.”

“Ready.”

“Thor.”

“Aye.”

“Iron Man.”

There was no response. It took him a moment before he realised what he’d done.

“Oh, right...”

He shook off the fog that threatened to cloud his mind and squared his jaw.

“Doombots, spotted in Seattle. Why Doom chose Seattle this time I don’t know, but at least NY and DC are getting a break.”

 

 

 

Doom laughed from his position atop the Space Needle, “Without your Iron Man you are nothing!” he boomed through the speakers.

Steve was clutching a wound in his side, still holding back a pack of bots using his shield. Thor was in the air, trying to take down the swarms with lightning and strength, but he couldn’t rival Iron Man’s manoeuvrability. Hawkeye had a difficult time getting between vantage points without easily reliable help, and Black Widow was working her way towards Doom. Objective: Take him out by any means.

Doom had obviously learned from his last battle with the Avengers. The bots had been upgraded and had obviously had improved tactical programming included in that. Without Iron Man in the air to provide constant updates from an aerial viewpoint with unbelievable maneuverability, always where he needed to be and always backing up whoever needed it at that exact moment everything was just so much harder.

Every time Cap went to ask Iron Man a question or ask for an update he felt a fist squeeze his heart painfully. He clenched his teeth and pushed the thought of Tony lost and alone from his mind as he rounded and slammed the edge of his shield into a bot, causing sparks to fly as it dropped to the ground.

“Widow,” he called into his comm, “How are you doing up there?”

“I can see him,” came the soft reply, “Going quiet.”

 

  
Natasha crept silently towards the figure standing atop the observation level. She kept her balance despite the buffeting winds, her hair drawn into a tight ponytail to prevent it blowing across her eyes and obscuring her vision. As she neared she drew the taser from her belt, holding it in front of her. One of Stark’s tinkerings, he swore this taser would be able to knock Doom out for long enough to neutralise him. She concentrated on her aim, the wind was gusting strongly and she needed to get him first try. Suddenly there was a crash and she was knocked forwards off her feet. She recovered with a front roll and came back up her to feet quickly, taser outstretched. She cursed in Russian as the bots formed a wall in front of her.

“Ahhhh, Black Widow,” came Doom’s voice. “You really think I would have let you catch me so easily?”

Natasha fired the taser, hoping that it would make its mark, but a strong gust of wind caught the prongs, carrying them away from the target. Natasha cursed again, dropping the taser and drawing her gun.

“How do you think your friends will fare with another of their team mates fallen?” he said, his tone chilling.

The bots began to advance and Natasha started shooting. She managed to take two down while retreating, their armour was thick and was continuously being upgraded against their weapons every time they fought.

“Some backup would be nice guys!” she said through the comms, alerting the rest of the team that she was in very serious trouble.

“On our way,” came the response, but she knew it would take too long. She needed to deal with this herself.

She dodged a volley of shots, still retreating, until she finally found her heel against the edge of the roof. Another curse, she pulled out another pistol and fought back as hard as she could, but when the explosion hit at her feet she had no chance. She was hurled back off the roof, and then she was plunging to the ground.

“TONY!” she screamed through her comm, before realising that Tony wasn’t there. Tony wasn’t going to catch her like he had so many times before.

 

 

Strips of pants material were steaming dry over the fire, Tony had cleaned them in some of the hot water he’d intended to use for drinking. Instead the rest of the hot water had been used to clean his wound, he winced as the hot water set pain lancing through his foot and cleaned away the layers of much and dirt from the toe making sure the whole area was as clean as he could get it. He’d also cleaned off the metal bottle opener from his multitool. He’d measured it against his toe and one or two presses should cauterise the whole area the nail had once occupied, then he placed it on the edge of the fire pit to get the metal as hot as he could.

He reached over to the multitool, mentally preparing himself for what was about to come. He took a deep breath, and quickly pressed the hot metal to the nail bed. He let out a long, ragged scream of pain as he held it there long enough to seal it, then turned the tool over to seal the rest of the nailbed. The whole ordeal lasted only seconds, but it felt like an age. He wretched dryly onto the ground beside him panted loudly as the pain throbbed through him, collecting his mental energy enough to inspect the newly sealed injury. He winced as he gently investigated with a finger, making sure that it wasn’t bleeding and there was no raw open skin left. He was relieved to find he’d got the whole area and that he didn’t need to submit himself to that pain again. He wasn’t sure if he even could. Leaning over he took the dried strips of pants leg off the spit and carefully bandaged his toe, making sure that it was tied on tightly so it wouldn’t get kicked off while he slept. Forcing himself to eat the entire cooked fish through his nausea he lay down to try and get some sleep.

 

 

 **WHERE IS IRON MAN?** was blazoned across the newspaper, bold and accusing. Steve muttered to himself as he walked past, a cap pulled low over his face to try and keep free of the stares that usually followed him. He knew it wouldn’t be long until the press really started to ratchet the story up. Tony had missed missions before, most of them had, but the press would latch on to anything. When Tony failed to appear next time, it would become a frenzy. They didn’t know it had been a month since he’d disappeared, but it probably wouldn’t take them all that long to realise there hadn’t been any paparazzi shots across the gossip blogs or leaks of potential business talks for longer than normal. His expression darkened as he jammed his hands deeper into his pockets, shoulders hunched up. Was this how Howard had felt when he’d gone missing? Did he have to deal with reminders every step of the way to their favourite lunch place? Had he ever been able to eat fondue again? The Howard Tony had known growing up certainly sounded like a different man from the person he’d considered a friend. Had his disappearance played some part in that?

He shook the thoughts from his mind, concentrating on the fact that that was in the past. Right now, Tony being missing, that was the present, and it was something he could change. He dialled Natasha’s number as he walked. She answered with a quick

“What’s up?”

Steve’s expression could have melted steel, “We’re taking another trip to SHIELD HQ.”

 

 

“We know he’s somewhere in the Amazon basin!” Steve shouted as he slammed his fist into the table. Fury regarded him calmly with his good eye.

“As I told you already, SHIELD does not have the resources to search every god damn inch of that forest!” he shot back. “Do you have any idea how large the area you’re asking us to recon is? It would take years – decades to find someone in there, and that’s assuming it’s actually possible.”

“Something must be done to retrieve our comrade,” Thor growled.

“And I assure you we are working on it,” came the reply.

“Fury, you saw what happened in Seattle. It was blind _luck_ that Thor was able to catch Natasha. A couple more seconds and she would have died,” Steve said coldly.

“Then I suggest you practice more.”

For a moment Fury wasn’t sure if he’d crossed the line. The rest of the Avengers glared at him with pure unadulterated fury, Clint holding Bruce’s forearm with white knuckles. Static electricity crackled in the air. Eventually Steve sighed and took a step back. The others followed him out of the office, but their expressions never changed.

 

 

Natasha gave a sad smile as she saw Steve sitting at a workbench through the windows of Tony’s lab. At her asking, JARVIS opened the doors and allowed her access, something she wasn’t sure he was supposed to do. She hadn’t been Tony’s favourite person after all. She sighed, figuring it meant JARVIS was worried about Steve. It would make sense, they all were.

She stepped into the room and put a smile on her face, “Hey soldier.”

Steve looked up at her as she walked over to him.

“Keeping the bots company?” she asked, looking over to DUM-E who was greatly enjoying the absent minded head scratches from the blond haired man.

Steve shrugged and looked up at her, “They get a little lonely when Tony’s not spoiling them rotten.”

DUM-E obviously took offense to that as he shook his claw. Steve laughed.

“Oh come on, he does spoil you. There is no way you need a full tune up every two weeks.”

Natasha smiled at DUM-E and then Steve, “They’re well past due then, is that what you’ve been doing down here?”

Steve’s smile turned to a sad frown, “No. I don’t know how and I’m not sure Tony would want us to poke around inside his bots. I think he considers them to be the closest thing he has to children.”

“Fair enough,” Natasha replied with a slight nod of her head, “Makes sense. So what are you doing in here all the time then?”

He sighed and leant back on the stool, gesturing to the pad of paper on the workbench, “Drawing, mostly.” He ran a hand through his hair, “Trying to keep my mind occupied with something less... painful.”

Natasha put a hand on his shoulder as she looked at the sketches. They were all of Tony in some way or another. Leaning over a workbench, patting a bot on the head, mid-explanatory gesture...

Natasha smiled softly, “Come on Cap, dinner arrived a few minutes ago. Come eat with us tonight.”

Steve sighed and closed the drawing pad, and turned to Natasha with a smile, “Sure, I’m pretty hungry.”

“You’re always hungry,” replied Natasha as he got up and they started to walk towards the door. He laughed.

 

 

More missions went by, more bad guys trying to take the world by force. They seemed to be showing up more regularly now that the media had started questioning where one of their major players had got to. There was only so much damage control Pepper could do, releasing statements that Tony was busy with other projects. Stocks in Stark Industries were starting to slip as investors began to worry about what was going on.

After a particularly tiring and disgusting encounter with some kind of self-replicating slime creature, the team had been shuffled through into a press conference room and into their seats. They still dripped ooze from some places, Clint wiped some off his shoulder and onto the table cover by his microphone, the stuff was obscenely sticky and seemed to be attracted to skin. The whole team was in a foul mood, facing potentially hours of scalding decontam showers at SHIELD.

The reporters stood and asked their questions, the run of the mill ‘where was it from’, ‘what was it’ and ‘is it going to come back’ somewhat blending in together. A woman in a red skirt suit stood up to ask her question, the team anticipating another bland same old question.

“Why has Tony Stark not been working with you recently?”

Steve, Bruce and Thor visibly stiffened, Clint and Natasha showing their training by not reacting.

Steve leaned into his microphone, taking a deep breath to calm himself, “With all due respect ma’am, that has nothing to do with the situation today.”

The woman cocked an eyebrow, “Oh but it does. We all know what happened in Seattle. How long is it going to be before he’s working with you again?”

“We- We don’t have a timeframe on that,” Steve said, trying to make himself come across as untroubled by that statement. It didn’t work.

“Why did he stop in the first place?”

“He’s working on a big project at the moment and he needs to focus on that right now. He knows we can handle ourselves,” Steve looked at the others at the table, seeing each of them give a tiny nod, “I think we’re done for today.” He stood abruptly, the team following suit and leaving the conference room. Steve tried to block the smug look on the reporter’s face from his mind.

 

 

The team simultaneously looked towards the ceiling in confusion as the sound of Coldplay came blasting through the sound system at an almost painful volume. They exchanged glances before Clint’s expression softened.

“I think I know what’s going on here,” he shouted over the music before leaving the room to go and find his absent teammate.

Clint opened the door to Steve’s apartment and took in the scene. Steve was standing in the middle of the room with his eyes closed, standing stock still. Clint smiled wanly.

"JARVIS, lower the volume please.” The music instantly lowered to a much more manageable level as Steve spun round to look at Clint.

Clint put a bright smile on his face, “Steve, what are you doing? You know Tony would kill you for playing this in the tower, right?”

Steve’s expression hardened for a moment, “Will, Clint. Tony _will_ kill me.”

This time Clint had to keep the pain out of his eyes. “That was the idea, actually,” Steve said, his voice small and a distant smile briefly played over his lips, “I figured if he knew what I was doing he’d come back out of sheer will to make me stop.”

Clint’s eyes filled with sympathy, “Cap-“

Steve tensed, “No, don’t. He’s out there Clint. He’s still alive.” Steve bunched a fist, “He’s _going_ to come back.”

Clint looked at him, waiting for Steve to say what he needed to say.

He rubbed a hand roughly against his forehead, pacing angrily, “I told him to be careful!” His breathing was coming in loud angry bursts, “He didn’t even know what it did!” He braced himself against the wall, “I should have told him not to test the damn thing! I shouldn’t have let him! It’s my fault, Clint!” Steve suddenly stopped, looking at the fist sized hole in the wall he’d just created.

His shoulders dropped and he looked at Clint with tears in his eyes, “He _is_ going to come back, right?”

Clint took a step forward and bit back the ache in his heart, “I don’t know,” he managed quietly.

“Me neither,” came Steve’s small voice as he buried his head against the smaller man’s shoulder. Clint wrapped his arms around him and tried to hold back his own tears as Steve sobbed against him.

 

 

Tony stumbled over a tree root and couldn't muster the energy to swear. Breathing heavily he leant against the trunk, resting his forehead on his arm. He'd had lost count of the days and weeks as he tried to keep moving, only knowing it was so long due to unpleasant reaction his skin was having to the flaking arc reactor. He idly wondered how much longer he could take it, whether it would just be easier to sit between the buttresses of a giant tree and accept what was going to happen rather than stumble his way through the forest until he couldn't go any further.

He willed himself on, stopping to drink some water from a cupped leaf. He closed his eyes and scratched at one of his sore spots. Suddenly he froze as he heard an unfamiliar but tantalising sound. The rumble of an engine and the clanking of metal. He shook his head to make sure he wasn't hallucinating, and for a few seconds longer he heard that distant, hopeful noise.

Tony started in the direction the noise had come from. He tried to shout, but he was barely able to produce a croak. He cleared his throat and called out again, knowing it was futile but he knew with all of his heart that he was the closest to rescue right now that he was probably ever going to get. It felt like an age but soon the trees around him started to thin. Holding his arm up against the bright sun he finally cleared the forest, feeling a hysterical giggle escape his lips as he laid eyes on the wide dirt road he had walked onto. The packed, bare earth felt strange beneath his feet and he dropped to his knees, too exhausted to cry. He wasn't sure how long he stayed that way, but he knew he had to make a decision. He had no idea how well travelled the road was, but judging by the scale of it he knew that either direction would eventually lead him to some kind of civilisation. The difficult part was not knowing which direction would get him there faster. After playing an internal game of eeny-meeny-miney-mo he decided to go left. He pulled himself off the ground and started trudging. The sun beat down on him relentlessly as he was no longer protected by the canopy, but he knew he needed to stay on the road to have a chance of being seen.

 

 

Laughing faces filled the screen, Tony hanging from the arm wrapped around Steve’s shoulders. Their eyes were creased with mirth as Tony pulled a funny face at the camera. The pictures changed, this time showing an armoured Iron Man, uniformed Captain America and Hulk chucking New York’s rubble heaps into stone crushers and flatbed trucks as the cleanup hit full force. It had taken months and months of hard work to even notice progress had been made, even with the Avengers and SHIELD helping as much as they could. Now the images displayed Clint trying to teach Thor how to play Twister. Quite a lot of alcohol had been consumed that night, and Thor was both enjoying himself thoroughly while still being frustrated at how easily Clint hit every combination. Soon it was Tony and Steve’s turn. It ended quickly as Tony tried to stretch over Steve to reach a tile but being too short to reach, instead the two men landing in a giggling heap.

“You are in danger of falling into a stupor,” came Thor’s voice from the doorway. A glass smashed into the wall beside him. “Know I will not relent to your requests for Asgardian mead in the future.”

“Go away,” came a low, slurred response from the figure on the couch. “I’m busy.”

Thor smiled sadly, “Nay, my friend, you are drunk.”

“Leave me alone,” Steve protested as he felt a strong arm pull him up off the couch and hold him under the arms.

“It is time for you to sleep,” Thor said as he helped the drunk, stumbling super soldier out of the room. “You are doing your grief no honour by trying to drown it out.”

“I just want him back,” Steve whispered.

“So do we all, shield brother. So do we all.”

 

 

 

Tony continued to trudge along the road, his only change of salvation, even through the torrential downpour of the mid-afternoon. He was so used to be wet all the time he barely registered it, though the beating of the raindrops was much more intense without the shelter of the trees. The rain roared as it turned the surface of the road slick, and he had to be careful not to slip in the mud. Absorbed in his thoughts he didn't notice the change in cadence of the roaring until it became too loud for him to ignore. He started and looked behind him wildly. He could see the figure of a truck coming up behind him. He froze for a moment in relief before shaking his head and starting to wave his arms and shout. He ran into the middle of the road continuing to make as much noise as he could while jumping up and down, waving his arms. As the truck reached him it slowed, but it didn't stop. He moved from the middle of the road to avoid being run over. The truck rolled up to him but still wasn't stopping. He saw the driver looked suspiciously out of the window at him. He realised he was in the depths of the jungle and he probably looked like a crazy possible murderer. He tried to figure out how to make it obvious he wasn't a threat, before suddenly having a realisation and pulling the tied-on goggles away from his arc reactor. It took a moment, but he saw the driver's eyes widen in recognition. The truck stopped and he ran around to the other side, trying not to slip in the mud and pulled himself into the cab of the truck, pulling the door closed behind him.

Tony slicked his sopping hair back, closing his eyes and sighing. He rolled his head to the side to look at his rescuer. “Thank you,” he managed, “Thank you. Thank you.” The man nodded his head and pointed at a poster. Tony couldn't understand the writing, but it was fairly obvious a missing person poster, and right in the middle was a picture of him. And a picture of his arc reactor. He smiled wanly, his arc reactor had been the only reason that the truck driver had stopped for him. The driver reached towards him with a bottle of water and a packet of beef jerky and Tony almost snatched them out of his hands. “Thank you,” he said emphatically, pulling the top off the bottle and downing it. He tore the top off the packet of jerky and savoured the first bite, full of pepper, before ramming a fistful into his mouth. He jaw ached as he chewed but he couldn't imagine a better feeling. He swallowed the mass down, feeling his throat scratch and protest. He sighed contentedly and laid back against the chair even as his stomach began to protest at suddenly having food and water filling it. He smiled with relief and closed his eyes.

When Tony awoke it took him a few moments to gain his bearings and realise where he was. He started until he realised he was in the truck, the strong jungle sun beating through the window as he watched the trees blur past. His stomach rumbled as he stretched, before realising the driver was holding out a cereal bar for him. He managed a couple of bites before the sugary taste overwhelmed him and he had to put it down on the dashboard. Soon the trees gave way to fields, and Tony started to see farmers working out in them. Seeing people after so long on his own was difficult for him to adjust to, even though the farmers never even looked up at the truck as it trundled past. He felt himself drift in and out of sleep as they travelled.

 

 

 

Steve trudged into the kitchen, sweatpants tied roughly at his hips, dressing gown lying open. He pulled open the fridge door, pulled out a jug of orange juice and drained most of it standing in the cold that soothed his aching head. He leaned his head against the pillar of the fridge for a moment to let his roiling stomach settle before noticing the noises of breakfast in the background. He closed the door to the fridge, finished the jug of juice and threw it into the trash before turning around. Bruce was standing at the stove, frying something. Clint and Natasha were sitting at the breakfast table eating cereal and reading the newspaper. Thor was sitting back in a chair, legs propped up on the corner of the table, noisily eating toast and marmalade.  
Steve closed his eyes as an ache throbbed through his head; he had forgotten just how awful hangovers really felt. He slowly shuffled to a free seat around the tablet, dropping down into it with no grace and roughly propping up his head with an arm resting on the table. He looked over at Thor who was watching him as he stuffed another slice of toast into his mouth.

He sighed, “I’m sorry about last night Thor. I was _very_ drunk.”

Thor swallowed, “Do not apologise friend. We all despair at times, I was honoured you allowed me to be there to help, even a little.”

“Thanks,” Steve said sheepishly. He smiled, “Next time I ask for Asgardian mead though, please don’t actually bring me any. I forgot how bad the day after can be.”

Thor laughed, “It is indeed a potent brew.” This time a real snort of laughter left Steve.

Suddenly a plate of bacon, scrambled egg and toast was set down in front of him, along with a large glass of water and some tablets. He looked up to find Bruce smiling down at him. “Eat up, you need to soak up the rest of that mead that’s making you feel so queasy. Not to mention we could hear your stomach grumbling long before you got to the kitchen.”

Steve swallowed the tablets with the water as Bruce sat down beside him at the table to nurse a mug of tea. “Thanks,” he said softly before taking a bite of the butter-soaked toast, feeling the warmth of the fresh food in his throat and feeling a little better just for having something solid in his stomach. He finished the slice and a rasher of bacon before noticing Natasha looking at him from the corner of her eye. He smiled faintly at her.

“How are you doing?” she asked softly.

Steve sighed and leaned back in his chair, “Better. I think. I think I can work through it, anyway.”

She smiled, reached over and squeezed his hand. He gave a squeeze back, grateful for the small gesture.

“I’m really grateful for all you guys. Thanks for... well, putting up with me.”

“No need to apologise,” Clint said, “We’ve all lost people. We understand. We miss Tony too.”

There was a knock on the table as Bruce put down his plate of bacon and eggs, sliding into the chair beside Steve. They shared a reassuring glance, and Steve squeezed Bruce’s shoulder.

“Exactly, he is- _was_ \- your friend too. I have been so selfish the last couple of months. When Bucky died it wasn’t like I could just take time off from the war to grieve. I guess I just didn’t know how to deal with losing such a good friend without something to throw myself into.” He looked down into his glass, swilling the last liquid around the bottom.

“I’ve been so obnoxious,” he smiled and groaned, “I mean, playing Coldplay full tilt through the tower? _Wow_.”

Clint smiled widely this time, “Hey, you don’t think I didn’t play all of the sad Whitney Houston songs top volume after Coulson died then you are sorely mistaken, my friend. I think Natasha even joined in once or twice!”

Natasha gave him a playful punch on the arm, smiling, “ _That_ was supposed to be a secret, Clint.”

Steve let out a laugh, looked at his two spy friends, and then couldn’t hold back the giggles.

 

 

 

Tony awoke with a start as he felt a hand shaking his shoulder. The driver smiled at him and jumped out of the cab, walking around the front and motioning for him to get out. He undid his seatbelt and pushed open the door, climbing down on the ground. He looked around, figuring out that they had stopped at a gas station. He winced as he began to walk, suddenly aware again of the pain in his feet. Running his hand over his face he froze. He stared from between his fingers in a stupor, taking in the fact that there was a phone on the wall of the gas station. A pay phone. He stumbled towards it, his mind searching for the number for the tower. He let a frustrated howl escape his lips as he lifted the handset and realised he had no money to activate the phone. He felt tears start to come to his eyes before he heard a noise behind him and turned to find the truck driver holding out some coins. Tony looked at him, waiting for him to close his hand. When the driver nodded at his hand he greedily grabbed the coins and fed them into the phone. He prayed as the phone rang, hoping beyond hope that someone would pick up. After what seemed like an eternity the ringing cut off.

“This is the direct line to JARVIS, who is calling? I do not recognise this number.”

“Oh my God,” Tony croaked, trying not to laugh and cry at the same time, “JARVIS, it’s Tony.”

“Sir? Are you ok?”

“I’m alive.” He sighed, “It’s good to hear your voice. Can you put me through to the tower line please?”

“Certainly sir,” JARVIS replied, and Tony could swear he heard a new tone in his voice.

“Hi, Stark Tower?” came a voice through the phone.

“Bruce?” Tony asked quietly.

There was a beat of pause, Tony could hear laughter in the background, “Who is this?”

Tony smiled, “Tony Stark here, just a courtesy call to say I don't need your services as house sitters anymore.”

 

 

The room went silent at the noise of the phone hitting the floor. Steve was already on his feet and moving to the phone while Natasha was quickly heading for Bruce who had gone completely white. As she put an arm around his chest to stop him from collapsing Steve spoke into the phone.

“Hello? Who is this?”

Steve froze as the voice on the other end washed over him.

“We're on our way.”

The others looked at him concerned as he realised the colour must have drained out of his face as well. He turned to them as he put the phone down on the counter, trying to steady his shaking hands.

“Quinjet. Now. And alert SHIELD medical we are going to need them in the next couple of hours and they better be ready.”

 

 

 

The flight to Itaituba felt like it took eons, each of the avengers simultaneously excited, anxious and scared of what they were going to find when they arrived. Bruce’s knuckles were white as his gripped the edge of his seat, Steve’s hand resting on his shoulder while his mind worked in overdrive, so much going on that he could only perceive it as almost white noise. Clint and Natasha sat in the front, concentration and determination painting deep grooves in their faces. Thor was uncharacteristically silent, standing towards the back of the jet with a concerned expression. It had taken them hardly any time to suit up and get in the air, though it did take Natasha a minute to break Bruce out of his shock. Steve had never moved so fast in his life, his heart beating at a thousand miles per hour. He’d spoken barely anything to Tony, knowing than time was of the essence, but hearing his voice through the phone had made him want to drop to the ground. That broken, cracking voice had sounded so alien, but yet so familiar.

“We’re nearly there,” came Natasha’s clipped voice from the cockpit. Steve almost jumped out of his seat, walking over to look out of the windows. He could see the sprawling grid of the town surrounded by fields past the tree line of the Amazon forest. He took a deep breath, they would be landing in a couple of minutes. He walked over to Bruce.

“Are you ready?”

Bruce looked up at him and nodded sharply. Steve offered him a hand up and the two men walked to stand by the ramp of the Quinjet.

“Descending,” Natasha said. A few moments later Steve felt the jet touchdown and steeled himself. The ramp opened slowly and Steve squinted into the bright sunlight. He caught a heat distorted figure standing in the distance and had to stop himself from running towards it. Instead he squeezed Bruce’s shoulder, “Do you see him?”

Bruce looked up at Steve who nodded, knowing that Bruce had taken Tony’s disappearance the hardest. He deserved to get to him first, even though Steve felt like his was suffocating. Bruce took a deep breath and walked forward. Steve followed him some distance behind, watching the other figure intently. He watched as Tony walked towards them and felt his heart ache. The man he knew had been replaced by a spindly, almost emaciated person, with matted long hair and a grey tinted, wild beard. He saw him and Bruce meet, regarding each other for a moment before embracing tightly. He saw the two men break apart and Bruce’s shoulders shake with what looked like laughter. He was close enough to see a smile across Tony’s face. He caught his breath as he saw Tony look over Bruce’s shoulder at him, the smile fading. He looked back at Bruce who made a gesture towards Steve and Tony slowly started walking towards him. He only then realised that the rest of the team hadn’t followed him, they were letting him meet Tony on his own terms, like he had with Bruce. He felt tears start to well in his eyes as Tony got closer but battled them back.

Tony was suddenly in front of him. They looked at each other silently before Steve found his voice.

“So, enjoy your vacation?” he smiled wanly, desperately wanting to have normal back.

Tony laughed a crackle that sounded painful, “What, didn’t you get my postcards?” Tony lifted an arm and Steve saw what he was holding, “And I kept my trusty safety goggles with me on your command.”

Steve felt the tears run down his cheeks as his chuckled. He looked at the floor, “I – We, thought we’d lost you,” he said, trying to keep his words steady.

He saw Tony’s eyes crease in pain, “Steve-”

“I didn’t want to give up on you,” he choked, and suddenly found Tony in his arms, his face buried into his chest. Steve felt the dam break and wrapped his arms tightly around the thin little man as they both cried.

Steve wasn’t sure how long they stood there but he felt the rest of the team join around them in their embrace. His tears tapered off .

“Let’s go home,” he said, quietly.

 

 

 

Tony had wires all over him, drips in his arm, salve on his blistered, sunburnt skin. His beard, and hair, had been shaved completely. Steve counted no less than five separate sets of stitches just from his chest upwards.

Tony stopped scratching at his peeling nose as he saw Steve. It had taken him almost ten seconds, Steve noted.

“Ahh! Steve,” he said, smiling. Steve winced as it showed just how much weight Tony had lost, his cheekbones creating hollows on his face.

Steve put on a brave face and smiled brightly, “Hey Tony.” He walked over to stand by the bed, “How’re ya feeling?”

“Well, I feel like I got stuck playing a game of Jumanji. And,” Tony pulled a face, “Botflies have to be the most disgusting creatures on the face of the planet. Seriously. I am not a walking incubator!”

Steve suddenly felt nauseous as the meaning sank in, “You mean...?”

“Yep! The bastards laid their eggs in me. _In_ me, Steve! That’s just not right! Getting them out took way too much Vaseline and ducktape for any situation outside of the bedroom.”

Steve blushed, smiling genuinely this time. He was glad Tony’s sense of humour was still strong as ever – his friend was going to be ok.

Tony looked intently at a finger as he picked at the broken and ragged skin around the nail, “At least I am going to have some really kickass scars out of all of this. Chicks dig scars, doncha know? Well, of course you do, you fought in the war.” Tony flapped his hands dismissively, “Though you don’t really get scars. Bah, you know what I mean.”

Steve gave Tony a pointed look, “If you keep picking at those nails I am going to tape your fingers up.”

Tony flashed him a scorned teenager look, “Yesss daaaadddd,” he said, rolling his eyes as he idly scratched at his chest by his arc reactor.

Steve frowned as he saw the red, angry skin that surrounded it, clear even through the layer of salve.

“Hey Tony, I’ve got something for you,” he said, and Tony looked at him in excitement.

Steve pulled his hand out from his back, holding out a pristine new arc reactor casing.

Tony’s eyes brightened with relief, “Thank Christ, I am so glad I am clever enough to keep back-ups. I hope DUM-E didn’t threaten you _too_ badly when you went to get it?”

“Well, there was a lot of waving around a fire extinguisher. I got the feeling he was hesitant to use it though.”

Tony let out a laugh, quickly grabbing his side in pain, “God, I am looking forward to seeing my robots.”

Steve let out a breathy laugh before looking back down at the arc reactor in his hand. He went quiet, really taking in the structure. It was fairly weighty, Steve couldn’t imagine the feeling of having it in his chest.

He looked back up and caught Tony’s eye, “How... How are you going to replace the one in your chest with this?”

Tony looked at him for a moment, “You’re going to do it.”

“Me?” Steve asked, looking puzzled. “No Tony, I can’t!”

“Sure you can,” Tony said, “It’s really easy. You’ve just got to unplug one wire and plug another one in.”

“Tony, I won’t. I don’t want to screw it up. I think it’s best if the doctor does it.”

Tony’s face took on a hard look, “No, Steve. I am not trusting some doctor with this. I trust _you_ , though. You won’t mess it up, I’ll talk you through it. You can do this. Please, do it for me?”

Steve stared at Tony, floundering in his thoughts. Could he do this? Was Tony strong enough to get through it? He steeled himself, running his hand through his hair, “What happens between the old one coming out and the new one going in.”

“Weeellllll,” Tony drew out, “I go into cardiac arrest, but it’s nothing I haven’t done before. I mean really, it’s not that bad-“

“Jesus, Tony! You’re far too sick! I can’t do that to you.” Steve felt the horror running through his veins, there was no way he was going to put Tony into cardiac arrest, what if he never came back? He’d already almost lost him, and he’d only just got him back.

“If you don’t, I’m just going to stay sick,” Tony said softly, “The arc reactor was never made to deal with a rust problem. Which is something I’m going to fix in the next upgrade because holy hell, this sucks. The structure of the external casing has been compromised, Steve, and it’s only going to get worse. Eventually this dying thing in my chest,” he tapped his rusted, flaking reactor, “Is going to fizzle out. Or possibly explode. And it’ll take me with it. If you don’t help me with this then I probably won’t make it out of this hospital.”

Steve felt sick, “I can get Pepper to do it, she’s done it before.”

Tony shook his head, “She left, Steve.” He smiled wanly, “Plus she made me promise I’d never make her do it again.” Tony flicked his eyes up to look directly into his, “You are the only person I trust to do this.”

Steve sighed, the arc reactor feeling heavy in his hand, “Ok,” he breathed, “But you owe me for this.”

Natasha and Clint guarded the door, holding back the nurses and doctors as Tony’s alarm went off.

 

 

 

In the weeks that followed Tony was in and out of medical examinations making sure he was improving. He started to put on weight through an extremely carefully managed dietary plan, with the insistence of the doctors that his body would reject most foods if he just tried to jump back in to his old ways headlong.

His first action upon being let out of hospital was to walk straight into his lab and give his bots a very thorough tune up. Steve had watched from the doorway smiling as Tony was surrounded by the eager bots before opening them up one by one and ranting at them about the state of their insides and _“How on earth could you ever let yourselves get this way?!”_ He’d spent hours upon hours, days and days in there since. Fine tuning things, tinkering with half-finished discarded ideas, throwing himself into being as busy as possible. He wasn’t the same. The once brazenly confident, forever muttering and gesturing man had become quiet. Where before he couldn’t seem to stand the sound of quiet, filling up any void with the sound of his own voice and music, now the silences stretched around him. Once the instigator of conversations, now he had to be prompted into them. Where he used to relentlessly tease and postulate with Bruce, now he was content for them to work in companionable silence, speaking when necessary or to share the odd joke here or there. Now he could watch movies with the Avengers on movie night without providing his very own Stark flavoured riff track.

Steve, or one of the other Avengers, tried to be in the lab as much as possible to make sure he was doing ok. Steve usually chose to be in there overnight as he slept so little, making sure that if Tony fell asleep he could take him up to bed. It became obvious quite quickly that Tony was suffering awful nightmares from his ordeal in the jungle. His fingernails often left crescent shaped marks in Steve’s arms as he carried him to bed.

This night was the worst Steve had seen him since he got back. He’d started to put some weight back on, his diet had been expanded slightly and he’d been in a good mood all day, even starting to show a bit of his old self, babbling on to Steve about his new ideas or why his old ideas didn’t work for a while before he got to the point of exhaustion and fell asleep. As Steve moved to pick him up the nightmares obviously started up again. Steve sighed sadly as Tony began to whimper and twitch.

“Come on, Tony,” he said softly as he picked the smaller man up. It still hurt to feel just how light he was in his arms. He gritted his teeth as Tony’s fingernails dug into his skin and walked him to his bedroom. The twitching got more and more distressed and the whimpers got louder. Steve laid him down on his bed and decided he couldn’t let Tony get stuck in that dream for another long night.

He laid a hand on Tony’s shoulder and shook gently, “Tony, wake up, it’s just a nightmare. Wake up.”  
Tony shot up and screamed. His eyes looked around in panic, chest heaving, before he saw Steve sitting on the edge of the bed, looking at him with concern. His face relaxed with relief and he leaned forward into Steve’s chest, resting his head against one of the strong shoulders. Steve gently wrapped his arms around Tony’s sweat-slicked body.

“It’s ok Tony,” he said quietly, “You’re home. You’re safe. We’re here.”

After a while of just holding him, Steve felt Tony’s breath start to become more even and regular. Eventually he thought Tony had fallen back to sleep and went to move. A quiet voice floated to his ears.

“Stay. Please.”

Steve felt his heart quicken a little as Tony pulled away from him. He saw dampness on his cheeks where he’d obviously let a few quiet tears run. Tony looked at him with exhausted eyes.

“I... I think it would help me sleep. You don’t have to, but I think it would help.”

“Of course,” Steve replied softly.

He walked round to the other side of the bed as Tony laid down again, kicked off his sneakers and climbed in under the comforter. He moved to lie behind Tony, wrapping an arm around the smaller man. He felt Tony relax and soon his breathing became deep and regular, while Steve lay still, his head on the pillow, his mind racing.

Sleeping together became a regular thing for Steve and Tony, Steve’s presence obviously comforted the troubled man. Tony’s sleeping had become much more regular and much less distressed.

 

 

 

Steve was sitting in Tony’s lab when the alert went out. He immediately moved to get to his uniform and get to the Quinjet. He stopped and turned on the staircase when he saw Tony following.

“No,” he directed at him.

Tony stopped and glared up at him, “I’m well enough.”

“No you’re not Tony. We can deal with this. We can’t deal with you going down on the field.”

Tony started to speak.

“No!” said Steve, more forcefully. “Stay here. We’ll be back soon, don’t come.”

Steve willed himself up the rest of the stairs, feeling Tony’s stare drill into his back.

 

 

 

 

“What the hell is that thing?!” Cap heard Hawkeye shout into the comm.

“Some kind of elemental or something,” came Black Widow’s reply.

“Aye,” Thor agreed, “It is organic yet it has great control over fire. It is not a being naturally of this world.”

“What matters,” Steve grunted as a bolt of searing flame hit his shield, “Is how we fight the damn thing.”

“If I use my heavy tips designed for speed and punch I can definitely get through to it, there is something corporeal in there. That’s pretty much what I’ve got. I can’t seem to do much damage though!” Hawkeye replied with the strained voice of concentration and physical exertion. “God I wish I had some of those explosive water heads Tony’s developing!”

“Good news Legolas, they’re right here,” came a voice that stopped Steve’s heart for a moment.

“Tony! What are you doing, you’re not fit enough to be in your suit yet!”

“What, you think I’m going to let you have all the fun?” came the reply, and Steve could hear the smirk.

“Thanks Tony!” he heard Hawkeye say, before a “Oh wow, these are amazing!” as a horrific shriek filled the air and the oppressive, burning sensation on breathing lessened a little. “How are you able to get so much water into them?”

“Genius, Clint. Remember? Coming your way Cap.”

Steve braced himself as he saw the grenade like item land a few meters away. It exploded into a painful barrage of needle like water droplets, drenching Steve and giving him enough space and time to get off of the melting asphalt of the road and towards a more sheltered position.

“Thanks,” he breathed, the cooler air feeling much more comfortable in his lungs, steam rising from him in plumes. “Now get back here so we can at least get a plan going.”

“Got one already,” came the reply, and Steve could hear the smug smirk Tony was wearing.

There was another squeal of pain and fury as Hawkeye hit his mark again.

“Tony don’t be a fool,” Natasha said across comm. Steve paled.

“What is he doing?” he asked, not able to get a decent view of the action through the blinding fire and heat haze.

“Saving your asses,” Tony snarked back, followed by Natasha.

“He’s going to try and blast the thing by himself. He knows we can’t get close enough.”

“Yep, very perceptive,” came the infuriating tones which meant he was amused.

“Tony, you can’t. We can handle this.” He struggled to keep his voice level, going for a low growl rather than the shouts he so wanted to unleash.

“I’m the only one here who can get near this thing without getting roasted like a Thanksgiving turkey, so no dice.”

“There he goes!” Hawkeye exclaimed. “Christ, be careful!”

Seconds later there was a loud screech and roiling clouds of steam filled the air, reducing visibility to mere meters.

“Owww,” the low groan came through the comm, Steve instantly on edge.

“Tony, are you ok? Report!”

“I’m fine,” came the reply with the hiss of breath being drawn between clenched teeth, “Just got a little hot for my liking.”

“Are you safe?”

“Yep, threat neutralised. It doesn’t seem to enjoy being soaking wet, SHIELD are going to have a whole new set of problems to tackle looking after this thing.”

Steve felt the tension drop out of his shoulders knowing that Tony was fine. The steam started to clear, revealing the melted and rehardened, glassy look of the buildings and roads. Panes had melted out of windows, cooling in puddles on the ground. Asphalt was warped and shiny. It looked like a Dali painting within a block of the small, steaming figure in the middle of the devastation. He saw a red and silver streak land beside the red and gold armour of Tony, hearing the exchange through comms.

“Thor, keep an eye on this. I’m going home to take a bath in aloe vera before any of those SHEILD medics get any ideas about coming near me.”

“Certainly, friend.”

“Tony, don’t you dare,” Steve rumbled as he started to jog towards the figures.

“Too late,” came the clipped response as the armour took off, Tony flying off to the tower. Steve felt his expression darken.

 

 

 

 

 

Steve burst into the lab, cold fury in his face.

“I told you to stay here,” he forced out between clenched teeth.

Tony turned towards him smirking, holding an icepack to his arm, “And let you get toasted? No thanks.”

“You could have been killed, Tony! You are not ready to be in that suit, and those burns are damn proof of that!”

Tony’s face turned to steel, “I am fine Steve! Stop treating me like I’m still broken, I am ready to be back on the team.”

“Sure, your stitches are out, your scars have gone pink and your nails are starting to grow again, but you and I both know that doesn’t mean you’re back to normal!”

“Damnit Steve, I have seen the footage from Seattle! I wasn’t there when you needed me and Natasha almost _died_. Don’t make me feel even more useless than I already do,” Tony spat back as Steve paled at the memory of Natasha falling, screaming Tony’s name.

Steve started walking towards his injured friend, stopping in front of him and looking down at him, “We weren’t prepared,” he said, before pointing a finger at Tony’s chest. “Just like _you_ aren’t now.” He ran his fingers through his hair in frustration, “I can’t lose you again! Don’t get yourself killed just after we got you back.”

“Well what am I supposed to do Steve?!” Tony shouted, stepping in towards the taller man in anger, “Am I supposed to just stand back and let you die? Is that what you want?”

Steve seethed, “Yes, if it means it isn’t you instead!”

“Yeah well,” Tony jabbed a finger into Steve’s chest, “that’s not going to happen. I’m not going to let you die of pride. I’ve already nearly done that to myself,” he growled.

And suddenly Tony was being pushed back on his feet, not understanding what was happening. He felt hands around his face and lips pressed desperately to his before he realised. After the initial shock, he relaxed and pushed back into the kiss, wrapping his arms hard around Steve’s back and head, pulling him in towards him. He felt himself taking steps as Steve pushed him backwards into the workbench. Tony groaned as Steve’s body pressed hard against his, and his hands started pulling up the hem of Tony’s shirt. He helped and it was quickly over the top of his head and on the floor as the kiss became more desperate and searching. Suddenly he was lifted onto the workbench, Steve in between his legs and pressing him backwards with want. Tony’s hands searched and began pulling Steve’s own shirt upwards.

“Sir, Captain, your presence is required for de-brief,” came the accented tones of JARVIS.

The two men pulled apart breathing hard, startled by the interruption.

“God DAMNIT!” Tony shouted, wiping his slicked hair back from his forehead. “I am going to _kill_ Fury.”

Steve pulled his shirt down and stepped back, cheeks flushed. He looked at Tony, “Oh God, I- I’m sorry,” he said breathlessly, “I don’t know what came over me.”

Tony rounded on him, “No you don’t,” his finger against Steve’s breastbone, “Don’t you apologise for that. I have been dreaming about that for a long time.”

Steve smiled and looked at the floor, “Me too,” he admitted.

“Good,” said Tony, jumping off the workbench and bending down to pick his t-shirt off the floor. “Because I would be pretty upset right now if I knew I’d never get to experience that again.”

 

 

 

 

The de-brief was even more torturous that normal. Tony had to justify his actions over and over to not only the rest of team but to Fury and SHIELD in general, clearly they all shared the opinion that he wasn’t ready to be back in the field. At least during the interrogation it gave him something to think about, once they moved on to discuss the rest of the fight he found he couldn’t keep his mind off Steve. Those hands, that _kiss_. His and Steve’s eyes kept meeting and flicking away, obviously his teammate was struggling with similar feelings. Tony could feel the blush in his cheeks, hoped he could pass it off as minor burns because he really didn’t need to be sitting in a room full of people _blushing about Captain America_. He needed a cold shower for more reasons than one.

After what felt like an eternity they were allowed to leave, Fury holding Tony briefly back to check if he needed any further medical support. When he left the room he found Steve standing waiting for him, hands awkwardly in his pockets trying to look nonchalant, while the others continued down the hall.

“You sure you don’t need to speak to a medic?” Steve asked with concern on his face as they followed down the corridor.

Tony rolled his eyes, “I am fine, I got aloe and cold water on fast enough that it’s nothing serious. Trust me, if I held up to your workshop visit earlier then I’m all good.”  
Tony enjoyed seeing the blush spread across Steve’s face, his ears turning red. His heartbeat picked up again.

 

 

 

As they left the building the rest of the team were discussing going out for ice cream if they could find anywhere in the city with any still left solid. Steve and Tony made their excuses – Tony needed to get back to the tower and cover himself in burn cream and of course Steve was being his regular overprotective self and insisting on following to make sure he was ok. Natasha raised an eyebrow but didn’t say anything, Clint insisted it was their loss.

Steve and Tony were quiet in the back of the car on the way to the tower. Tony thought his heart was going to burst from his chest. A little while in he felt Steve’s fingers find his, curling his in-between until they were sitting there in silence holding hands.

Tony broke the silence as they got in the private elevator to the top suits of the tower, still holding hands, both hearts racing like they were in middle school with their first crushes.

“Thank you… For not giving up on me. JARVIS told me you came down to talk to my bots while I was gone. That… means a lot.” Tony looked over at Steve who turned his eyes down and smiled faintly.

“I mean, it was the least I could do,” he turned to face Tony, his face becoming more serious. “You know we… we were really starting to think you were gone forever. Maybe dead. I didn’t think I was ever going to see you again and it…” he sighed. “It was really awful. Spending time in your workshop helped me pretend I was close to you. I kept thinking of everything I wished I said before you were gone, and then even when you got back I still couldn’t say.” He looked into Tony’s eyes with what seemed to be a trace of guilt.

The doors opened to Tony’s floor, he walked out pulling Steve beside him.

“Well, you certainly said it earlier,” Tony remarked with a cheeky smile.

He stopped outside a door.

“Well, this is me Cap,” he said, turning to look up at Steve, not letting go of his hand. There was a pause before Steve leant down and kissed him. He pulled away quickly, almost looking surprised at himself. Tony smiled, wrapped his hand around the back of his head and pulled him back down for deeper, longer kiss.

“Wanna come in for a coffee?” he asked with a glint in his eye as they broke apart.

“I’ve never been so sure of anything in my life,” Steve replied, opening the door behind Tony as he pushed forward with another kiss, slamming the door shut behind them.


End file.
